Karen Ryce Presents...
 
                                        Welcome to Powerful Grandparent

Hi, Powerful Grandparent!

Here you are going to be able to read and write about using our powers to create harmony in our
worlds. That is my goal.

I very recently realized what a great position of power we are in. We can not only positively
influence ourselves...we can positively influence our beloved grandkids (I feel the need to explain
that 'kids' included children and teens, that's why I use it)...we can positively influence our adult
kids...we can positively influence the relationship between our adult kids and their kids...

These are the areas of positive influence I intend to focus on, although there are many
more...whatever interests you and increases the good feelings in the world is a good way to go.
BLOG: POWERFUL GRANDPARENT
                                     Grandparents and Beloved Grandkids

We can't help but love our grandkids. They are treasured beings in our lives. We always want
the best for them, how difficult, gut wrenching and heartbreaking it can be when things go wrong
with and for them.

During these times, it can help them to know that you are there for them, loving them and
believing in them. It can help ease their pain and give them a sense of security that may
otherwise be threatened and shaky.

Your love and belief in them can help them maintain or even develop their self-seteem. Troubles
and problems in their lives can make it hard to find a safe haven. There may be troubles at
home. There may be trouble with their peers. There may be troubles at school. You can be their
sanctuary.

When you make respect the foundation of your relationship with your grandkids, then the love
you feel for them reaches them and nourishes them. That foundation keeps you from doing or
saying things that make them feel unloved.

Never doing or saying anything that is not respectful helps create harmony between you and
your grandkids. This makes you an excellent example of how to live harmoniously with others.
From you, your grandkids can learn the skills and attitudes that can help them live full and
satisfying lives...in spite of other troubles.

This is one of the ways to be powerful.
                                Trouble Between Adult Kids and Grandkids

It can be hard and heartbreaking when your own kids and your grandkids are having troubles
getting along.

Here is another area where grandparents can be powerful. They can be a powerful force for
healing for their kids and grandkids.

I know that often grandparents don't want to 'interfere.' I also know that often their kids or
kids-in-law resent 'interference.'

That's where the Power of Respect comes in. If you learn how to make respect your foundation
when you are relating to your kids or grandkids, it can cut through both of those attitudes.

It does this because it is empowering to everyone involved. It puts everyone in the seat of power.
Everyone gets to feel good and get their needs met. Imagine bringing a gift like that to your
family!

You can even all learn to do this together at a Power of Respect Vacation. Imagine...healing,
harmony and fun for all while getting the tools, and learning the skills and strategies, and
developing the attitude to maintain this.

Does it get better than that? Yes! When you are back to your daily life and everyone is still
getting their needs met and getting along well with others.

I know that it seems strange that it could happen so fast, and it may not...but it has happened
that fast and it is sure to happen when you apply the tools, skills and strategies of the Power of
Respect.
                                               Power and Your Grandkids

I was thinking about this blog this morning. I was specifically thinking about the word 'powerful.' I
thought maybe I'd better be clearer about what I mean by this word.

I don't mean the kind of power that people use to overpower someone else, like your grandkids. I
mean standing filled with your personal power and by that very stance empowering others, like
your grandkids to be filled with their own personal power. Then you both interact like that
together.

This is one of the things I mean by 'powerful' in this blog. You do this by knowing what matters to
you each moment and staying true to that. You want and encourage that same act of power in
others, like your grandkids.

For example, let' say you took your two young grandsons to play in the nearby park. All the
swings are being used except one. They both run over and both try to get on the swing at the
same time.

They are both pulling on the chains and announcing that they got there first and it's their turn.
Let's say you want to introduce them to the Power of Respect. You want to start cooperation and
discourage fighting.

Go over to them and ask, "Does anyone want some help?" Chances are almost 100% that one of
them, if not both of them, is going to try to get you as their ally. They want you to help them have
the first turn.

"Let me hold the chains and let's figure this out. So you each think you should have the first turn.
Right?" At this point they'll probably try to explain, at the same time, why they deserve the first
turn.

Then let them know that each of them is a very important person, and that you think that
together you can figure out something that both of them like.

This is when you do the 7-step strategy: End Conflict NOW! (Click on the link to go there)

It helps if you carry a small notebook and pen in your purse for just such situations. After a few
sessions with this strategy, maybe even just one, your grandsons won't need your help to find
mutually agreeable solutions.

It makes so much sense to kids that each one of them is important. They love discovering that
they can work out things out in ways that work for them both.

This is what I mean by being powerful.

I remember one time when I was working as head teacher in Children's House, our Montessori
school. I had already introduced the 7-step strategy. I noticed two children conflicting over
something. I came up to them and took my notebook out of my pocket.

The children saw me coming. They looked at each other. Then one said, "Ok, you can go first if I
can hold your bear." Then they ran out into the play yard . They had mastered the essence of
the strategy. They had only had a couple of lessons, but they no longer needed or wanted the
long version. Conflict had ended for them. Harmony took its place.

I was using my power and they had claimed their's. The power to create and live in harmony.
                                        Grandparents Raising Grandkids

This involves a lot of people these days. Somehow it seems more than it used to be. Anyway, if
you find yourself in the position of being a parent to young children or even teenagers, decide to
make respect your unshakable foundation. This will help you eliminate a huge number of
problems that might develop between you and your grandkids.

I know, this is how I raised my kids...once I figured it out. Unfortunately, I did not know this from
the beginning of their lives. I hope by now I have helped heal the harm I did by my 'I'm in charge
attitude.'

So if you don't want to cause more problems for them and for yourself, do whatever you have to
do to learn how to make respect your bottom line, your foundation for relating with your
grandkids.

It's not really hard and the positive, enjoyable results come so quickly it empowers you to
continue. It really makes the process of parenting so much easier and much less time consuming.

It's only hard if you have either such strong habits of being an authoritarian parent or a
permissive parent that you resist trying this other approach. But if you can just be willing enough
to want to be willing to give it a try. Then act on it. That tiny opening is enough to bring so much
enjoyment into your life. You will be amazed!

If you are willing to want to be willing to give it a try, a good place to start is here: The
Grandparents' Group. When you get there listen to one of the workshops or one of the Question
& Answer Sessions. Or do both. Also watch the videos and/or the webinar.

I look forward to helping you make respect your foundation and bringing relief and joy to your life
and the lives of your grandkids.
                                There Is Nothing Gentle About Spanking!

I still can't believe what I read in Grandparents.com! This is from someone who is now a
grandfather: "...Yes I do believe in a gentle spanking---but then you hold them, give them a hug,
and don't let them go until they stop crying..."

How can he think that he has treated his child gently if he has done something deliberately that
makes his child cry?

The number one definition of 'gentle' is 'kind.' Now maybe this grandfather thought it was
kindness to hurt his child. Maybe he thought that if he hurt the child a little now, it would save the
child from greater hurt later.

If this was such an effective and worthwhile form of teaching children how to behave, why is his
daughter not practicing this with her children? She is deliberately NOT practicing this! What does
that say about this practice?

I think that this practice has been well-established as based on wrong thinking. Even
pediatricians believe that spanking is not a really helpful form of teaching children how to behave
'properly.'

I have to let it be known that even the daughter's form of punishment is not really necessary, as
is also hurtful. There is no need to punish anyone!

There is a much more effective way of teaching kids how to behave...that does not involve
punishment...at all. It helps kids know exactly what to do and when to do it. It also enlists the
child's enthusiasm to behave acceptably. Kids are eager to participate. So are adults, once they
try this.

It's called the Power of Respect...and I'm not considered The Miracle Worker...of Education and
Parenting for nothing!
                                                  CALLING ALL ELDERS!

Elders, Seniors, Grands, Boomers…Help!

We are all desperately needed. We can help end so much trouble.

I awoke at 4:44 am this morning and have been going full speed since a 'knowing' was revealed
to me. Because of what I have learned and developed and implemented during the past 39
years, with your help, we can put an end to bullying and victimization (the foundation of so much
trouble), bringing harmony to people.

This I know! And I know how to do it. I've done it many times over, on a very small scale. But this
can't have much impact without massive help...and I believe that this is a time we need massive
help.

Knowing how to positively effect a child's life you just need to be a 'loving mirror' for that child.
Fill them with positive self-talk. Teach them that everyone is equally important. (The younger the
child is, the easier it is for them to know this.) Teach them how to live in harmony with others.

This is not hard stuff. I know how to do all of this and have developed a program to teach this to
others, from three year olds...to... In fact, three year olds learn this quickly and easily.

If this inspires you, contact me karen.ryce@happykidsco.com

Let's Do This!
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