| Karen Ryce Presents... |
| Power of Respect Mini-Course Lesson Three: Define The Problem Written Version |
| Lesson Three Define the Problem Now, you have decided when and where to have the meeting, and everyone involved is in agreement with that. You have your paper, pen and writing surface. You are ready to begin the next stage of the preparation. Define the problem and write it down. You need to come to an agreement on exactly what the problem is, before you write it down. Then double check on agreement after you write it down. It’s important to get this clear and written before you continue with the rest on the process. Keep clarity during each step of the process. Grandmother/Grandson Session Continued... “Tony, I am so glad that we are finally going to try this out. I’m sure we will be happy with our decisions. So, I am worried that you don’t seem to get your homework done.” “I don’t need to do homework.” (Although it may be tempting, please do not get distracted and get into a discussion right now. You can discuss this later in the process.) “Well, that may be. Remember this idea when we start writing ideas down. We can discuss it later. Oh, I forgot something. I should have told you that right now we are going to write down what problem we are working on, but before we write it down we are going to agree that this is the problem we are working on. Do you agree that we’re going to work on the problem of homework and come to decisions that we both like about it?” “Alright.” “Ok. So I’m going to write this: We are having problems about homework and today we are going to agree what to do to solve these problems. Does that sound right to you?” “Ok, write it.” “So, I wrote: We are having problems about homework and today we are going to agree what to do to solve these problems. Does that sound right to you, Tony?” “Yeah, Grandma.” A Family Session Continued... “Let’s get started. Shall I be the writer or does someone else want to write?” “You write this time, Mom.” “Everyone agreed? Ok. Now, we have to define the problem before I write it down.” “What do you mean?” “We all have to agree that we are here to discuss the same thing, so we don’t make the mistake of talking about different subjects. We were going to discuss about where and when we are taking our family vacation this summer, right?” “Right,” everyone chorused, except Gabby. “Now, before we can continue with that we have to reach an agreement about Gabby going or not.” “I want Gabby to go.” “I think Gabby should be able to stay here if she wants.” “Ok. Remember those ideas for later. Right now do we all agree that tonight we are going to come to decisions about Gabby’s vacation plans that everyone likes?” “Yeah, sure.” “Ok, that’s what I’m going to write down.” “Here’s what I wrote: Tonight we are going to decide about what Gabby is going to do during her summer vacation, especially during the time we are planning a family vacation. We have to make a decision that we all agree to.” “Sounds good.” |
