1. Think in terms of cooperation...
  2. Why is your child not cooperating with you?
  3. Find out what your child needs to be able to cooperate.


  1. Respond respectfully.
  2. Find out what they want you to know.
  3. Later you can tell them how their rudeness makes you feel.

Won't Pick Up Things

  1. Ask them to pick up their things.
  2. Ask if they'd like help.
  3. Tell them how you feel when they don't pick up their things.
  4. Ask what they need so they'd pick up their things.


  1. Ask if anyone needs some help.
  2. Keep calm and respectful.
  3. Let them know you can help them solve this so they both feel good..

Preventing A Public Temper Tantrum

  1. Pay close attention to them.
  2. Engage their interest:
  • point out things
  • sing to them
  • let them carry something for you
  • give them a snack
  • carry them / push in stroller

Doesn't Want To Go To Bed

  1. Ask why they don't want to go to bed.
  2. Explain why you want them to go to bed.
  3. If necessary, ask what they need to go to bed at "bedtime."

Doesn't Do Chores

  1. Keep calm, respectful and patient
  2. Tell them how you feel when they don't do their chores.
  3. Ask what needs to happen so they can do their chores.


  1. Understand child wants your attention
  2. Apologize for not paying attention sooner / maybe explain why
  3. Pay attention
  4. Later ask child not to whine
  5. Tell that you will pay attention when they first just ask
#1...Above All...

...Find Solutions That Everyone Involved Likes...
Agrees With...
Makes Them Feel Good!
Preparation can prevent many
common problems...
More on Disobedience...
  • Are their needs different than yours
    and, therefore, you need to

  • Have they misunderstood your

  • Have you misinterpreted their
    actions as disobedient just because
    they are not doing exactly what you
    expected them to do?

  • Are they tired of being bossed
    around, as we all can be?

  • As a behavioral model, are you
    frequently uncooperative with your
End Conflict NOW! Is so worth it!
3-year-old children learn it in minutes...
And then they do it!
Questions About Raising Happy Kids?
Submit Them Below...
Karen Ryce Presents...